Much depends, I think, on your relationship with your manager - how much you trust her to be sensitive and respect your confidence if your boss is also the office gossip that may put a different slant on your decision , as well as how you feel both you and she would respond if you did subsequently suffer complications or a loss.
Assessing the time you need and want to spend at home with your new baby is incredibly personal, and there will be all sorts of factors that combine to shape your decision that you may not be able to determine now. She is The Telegraph's careers agony aunt. Email your work and business questions to: work.
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Having Her Boss's Baby (Silhouette Special Edition #1759)
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Anonymous, 33 from Northampton. I became pregnant with my first child five months after starting a new job.
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Three months after returning to work following maternity leave, the organisation embarked on a restructuring. My role was one of six that was going to be made redundant but my team urged the board and director to rethink the proposals, which resulted in the director offering me a diminished role. In doing so she said that I should be grateful since getting pregnant so soon after joining was a surprise and a setback for them.
Having Her Boss's Baby (Positively Pregnant, book 1) by Susan Mallery
In my current role I have been shocked by the attitude of management towards maternity leave and parenthood. He openly decried the fact that women on maternity leave accrued holidays and pension benefits.
Anonymous, 42 from Liverpool. I have a PhD in science and worked as a research scientist at one of the biggest British companies. A month before I disclosed my pregnancy, my boss was very sure about putting me forward for promotion that year, and positive about my chances of success.
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Before I went on maternity leave, I worked very hard right up to the last minute and came back after just six months. When I returned nothing was said about my promotion. Instead, everything was stagnant and frustrating. I decided to leave and the UK to come to work in Scandinavian where there is much more gender parity, although there is still not complete equality.
Anonymous, 34 from Scandinavia. I am currently pregnant with my first baby. I have recently been actively encouraged by my employer to apply for a big promotion that has just opened up.
They are very supportive about the potential to fast-track the application before I start maternity leave and to find an intermediate solution to accommodate my being away for 12 months. I am very torn between pushing on in my career and taking the opportunity to focus on my family life and not overstretch myself on my return to work next year. While working in academia, I witnessed colleagues being asked about their plans for children when applying for promotions. I left academic science six years ago as the working conditions were not ones where a woman with aspirations for both a career and a family could get on — long hours, short-term contracts and pay that was too low to save for a home.
Mandatory HR training for all managers about gender discrimination, to prevent them asking about family plans during job interviews would be a move in the right direction, as would more support for women who want to challenge their employers when they think they have been discriminated against.
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